So I was reading the Vice Do’s and Dont’s book at work (as opposed to working), and those biting, offensively HILARIOUS captions started to influence the way I saw customers.
This one cat came up to the register and very forcefully placed a book on novel and short story writing on the counter. My first thought was “Everybody’s a writer, why not try to get an edge on the Great Unwashed by buying some jackass nonfiction writer’s take on fiction? Good purchase.” And then I saw it: he had “FATE” tattoed on his knuckles. At first I thought it would be cool to have FATE tattoed on my knuckles– that way, if I ever punched a speed-reader, he or she would have some non-personal force of nature to blame. I of course assumed that this was his reason for getting the tat as well, and I was prepared to mentally retract my previous unspoken sarcasm… then I realized that he would also see the tat when he was reaching into the mailbox for those rejection letters. Why do good ideas ALWAYS backfire?